21.10.12

here's to 7 hours in the emergency room.

Here's to 7 hours in the emergency room.

Of course everything just had to happen when my parents arent home and it was just me and my 3 domestic helpers. Mbak Mar, who has been with our family for more than 8 years, had a stroke. The CT showed intracranial bleeding. Slurred speech, rapidly decreasing awareness, vomiting. She lost control of her right side. Suddenly, all my first aid training flew out the window. I suddenly knew nothing. I didnt even remember the recovery position. I tried my best to stay calm and call my friend Mulia, who was on campus, so I was hoping she was with people that can give me some advice. My suspicions of a stroke was confirmed. Called sn ambulance from my mom's hospital, no luck. My driver was out, had to wait. Finally got to the hospital. And things were a blur.

A lot of things hit me throughout the experience, which is not over.
1. However mature I thought i was, i wasn't prepared to make all these decisions. It drained me. I just want to crawl into a hole where no one can talk to me.
2. Networking is of vital importance. Thanks to the friends of my family, mbak Mar got a spot in the ICU with minor nuisances and a minimum amount of money spent.
3. Gotta be nice to everyone, you may never know how they can help you get through life.
4. As medical students, we don't study for ourselves. We study for other people's lives. I will keep that in mind the next time i want to blow off a class or sleep early.

Point number 4 woke me up from the haze that was my first year of medical school. What if someday i couldve saved a life but can't because i dont know shit? What if someday, someone has a heart attack in front of me and i cant do anything because i forgot everything i studied in first aid? 

Shit just got real. 

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